Secret

Always on my mind

hidden in my heart

a secret waiting to escape,

something I see in you.

more than a pretty face

is a beautiful soul,

with a caring heart,

a joyful laugh and selfless eyes.

a presence that can light up a room.

the look of an angel

shining bright in her beauty.

difficult to find the words

even harder to say aloud.

the secret waiting to be told…

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It happens in an instance.

a specific time, the first occurrence.

it can take a while

it can be instantaneous.

thats the best part of it,

the uncertainty, the mystery

but you’ll know right away

when everything changes.

that moment you realize

its just not the same.

it can break you

or make you whole.

dependent on another

scary in thought

perfect in theory

everyone wants it

they strive to find it

and if you’re lucky enough to get it

youll never regret it.

its what we all want

to fall in love.

 

Never Forget

Unfortunately, we have forgotten. What was once a call for Unity, not just in the United States but in the World, has now become a meaningless phrase. Every year we repeat “Never Forget” but that’s just a reminder of what happened. It’s no longer a rallying call. It’s no longer a sumbol for Unification, for strength, for fighting for what we stand for. We were supposed to “Never Forget” that regardless of what happens, no matter what obstacles are in front of us, that we would stand together, stay strong, and continue to be leaders, be the best in the World. This country stands for HOPE, OPPORTUNITY, FREEDOM. Leaders in humanity, innovation, diversity, agriculture, economy, accepting of all religions, peoples, lifestyles, races. Care not just about ourselves but others. But that’t not who we are anymore.

We lost sight of who we are, we got scared. We got divided. We became what we are fighting against. We want to shut the world out. Instead of helping we want to make them pay. Instead of accepting we want them to conform or keep them out.  How did this happen? When did this happen? Why did we change? This is US losing. Our enemies win when they change who we are. We are no longer the country that stands for those Stripes and Stars. We no longer stand above the rest of the World. But, we can change that. We still have the core values we were raised on. What we learned growing up and what became so clear on 9/11. Who we are, not each individual person, but united as one.

We just need to remember what it really means to “Never Forget”

Unity, Freedom, Strength, Courage, Accepting, Love, Peace, Opportunity.

We are all great, we’ve never been anything less. It’s time to take back what is ours. Take back what we stood for and will stand for.

This is our Country.

Never Forget.

 

Eyes Like Windows

I can see through her eyes like windows.

The picture is clear but it’s not sunny.

I see her standing in the rain.

Nothing is moving but it’s full of chaos.

Something’s not right but the windows not lying.

She drops to the ground and everything falls.

I can see her hurting, screaming for help.

She looks up to the sky; She’s crying.

Nobody’s there to help her; Somebody help her!

The picture thunders, it gets darker.

Her world is bleak, it’s falling apart.

She tries to stand but is too weak.

Looks to the sky, she’s asking why?

A shadow comes into the picture,

shields her from the world.

Her world starts to gleam.

She stands on her own, no more crying.

She turns around and smiles with eyes like windows.

 

I Miss You

You were lost before I knew
what it meant to be without.
You were loved before I knew
what it meant to care.
You were missed before I knew
what it meant to remember.
I miss you.
Everyday I feel the hurt
Of not really knowing you.
Everyday I wish for more time
More memories to hold onto
Everyday I’m thankful for
The memories you got to make.
I miss you.
You are found now
In our memories.
You are loved now
In our hearts.
You are here now
In our thoughts.
I miss you.

Her Eyes

A gentle subtleness,
A pool of hope,
A hint of uncertainty,
A twinkle in the night,
A look of desire,
A gleam in the dark,
A sense of curiosity,
A sea of love,
A soft-spoken poem,
gives me butterflies
for she has
the most beautiful eyes.

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There’s something about her,
I just can’t keep out of my mind.
More than a beautiful face,
Speaks right to my heart.
I can see it when she smiles,
I can see it in her eyes.
The something I fell in love with,
The beauty in her soul.

Smile

Never seen anything so beautiful
Like a rainbow after a storm.
A natural gift to the world
Sometimes taken for granted.

A daily occurrence
That’s magical to see.
Like a sunrise or sunset on the Horizon
A beautiful picture to behold.

Like the stars at night
It never fails to shine.
A sight that can make you feel
Winter’s stillness and Spring’s turmoil.

An unforgettable moment
Leaving an everlasting image
That you would never want to miss.
Her smile.

Beauty

Under all the insecurities and fear,

There is a beauty that is hidden in her heart.

Her mind is lying, filling her up with doubt.

On the surface, she’s happy

But inside she’s hurting.

The truth hidden in her heart

Waiting for someone to uncover her beauty.

Not realizing there is

Beauty in the way she talks,

Beauty in the way she hopes,

Beauty in the way she dreams.

Her heart is hurting underneath the lies.

‘Til the one person speaks to the beauty inside her,

Who can convince her mind to see what he feels.

A beauty that isn’t seen but is felt.

Love.

Is The Fear Of Failure Holding You Back?

This question popped up in my mind recently. And by recently, I mean just within the past couple of minutes.  I was talking to friends on facebook listening to some music. We were talking about baseball and the MLB debut of a fellow Long Island Native, Steven Matz.  Matz had a long journey to the bigs, having gotten Tommy John surgery sometime after being drafted in 2009. And it reminds me of my situation. Clearly, I wasn’t drafted and had I been it makes my decision a littler easier. But if you haven’t read any of my past articles, I have a completely torn UCL and need Tommy John surgery.  I’ve contemplated getting it, fixing my elbow and being able to play baseball pain free again.  I’ve thought about if I get it and come back stronger than I was before that maybe there’s a slight chance at getting picked up on a Minor League team or maybe even an Independent team.

So, this train of thought got me thinking. If there is even the slightest chance of having your dream come true, taking the chance at something you dreamed about your whole life, why wouldn’t you jump at that opportunity and go for it? This doesn’t just pertain to me and it doesn’t just pertain to my dream of playing baseball. Another line of thought brought me to writing. And how I want to be an author and how I want to reach out to people. Give people hope and possibly shed a light on them when they are in a dark place.

But, is the fear of failure holding me back? Is the fear of risking the little I have right now really going to hold me back from going after the things I love? I’ve had this injury for two years now. I have contemplated surgery for the past year, wondering if it would be worth it. Wondering if I can afford to take time off from work. Like many others, I got bills to pay and missing a couple of months of work doesn’t seem like an option. So, is it fear or the lack of real options? If I am going to be 100% honest, I would have to say it is fear. The take possibly the biggest risk of my life up to this point, put everything into making one of my dreams come true and if it doesn’t work, I just fail. The effort wouldn’t matter, the time I spent wouldn’t matter. I would have failed and it would have been a waste of time.

That’s my biggest hurdle. Even with the support of friends and family that thinks that I would have a real shot…Fear is holding me back.  Just like in writing, that if I pour my heart and soul into writing and it doesn’t work out, then what do I have left? My two dreams would be failures and I would have nothing to show.  But as I write, I can hear it in my heart that do I really want to go on through the rest of my life not giving it my all? Do I really want to take the chance at regretting not trying in the first place?

So, there really are two questions here. What’s worse, not trying at all because you are afraid of failing or giving it your all and risking failure. Only one of those options has an upside. You can give it your all and fail and grow from that experience or give it your all and succeed. But if you don’t try at all, you are only failing. There is no growing, there is no experience, there is only regret.

This isn’t the most organized post, this isn’t the best I could write. This is a post from my heart and my thoughts. As I sit here writing, really trying to contemplate what I need to do and how to do it. I know that I need to do what I can, because I believe I can be successful. The fear of knowing I can fail, the fear of knowing how hard I will have to work is the only thing that is holding me, us, you back.  To beat this fear, we must be okay with failing and be okay with knowing that we did our best and gave ourselves the best chance to succeed. The rest isn’t up to us but at least we will know, we gave it our best and we will have no regrets. And remember, we are not the only ones being held back by fear, support your friends, your family, and people we don’t know. Because we know what it’s like to have Fear hold us back.